hello!
It’s been a while. Longer even than I’d realized. I’ve missed you.
It was an unexpected absence I took from this space. Just when I thought shingles was beat, it knocked me flat again. This time I didn’t continue (almost) as normal, this time I was down for the count.
Full days of sleeping, in bed or on the couch, lots of prayers, lots of vitamins. Not much of anything else.
And I’m sure this will sound melodramatic but it’s been the hardest month I’ve known. Not because of the pain of shingles (although that hasn’t been a walk in the park). It’s been hard because I’ve been brought, kicking and screaming, to surrender, to giving up, to letting go.
There was much I was not able to do. There was much, much, much that I had to rely on my super-hero hubby and super-sidekick kids to do. There was much that had to be left undone.
It’s been a struggle for everyone.
Though I’ve been reminded time and time again of grace.
I’ve received support, encouragement, and prayers. I’ve dropped to my knees. I’ve cried countless tears. I’ve sunk low, I’ve been raised back up. I’ve ached David’s Psalms. I’ve filled pages and pages with my pain, I’ve filled more with my thanks.
And I’ve known this is a work, not just an illness. It’s been transformation, education, growth. Those dark soul corners where pain slinks away to hide are being brought to the light. I’m learning to find strength, seek beauty, offer forgiveness.
I’m on a journey to healing, body and soul.
::
I’m doing much better now. Not 100% but feeling good and returned to mommy duties. And so so thankful. Thanks for the prayers, healing thoughts, and kind notes.
